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Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Painful, it must have been
or was she benumbed,
when she fumbled down the stairs made of love,
shattered into a million pieces,
each piece, too tiny to pick,
each piece, too far to find,
There must be a place
for the broken, ruined, destroyed and healed...
but she lives somewhere in the clouds of peace
as specks of dust, unknown and unseen...

Friday, November 22, 2013

There had to be a reason why he is today the way he is. He'd either stand out in a crowd or he'd be like an invisible gush of air that passes by which no one cares to notice. But nevertheless, he'd always be alone, away in his own thoughts.


They say everyone has a story to tell yet there are stories we never get to hear. Stories of pain, of grief, of trauma. And these stories would make you wonder if they are true.

And then these stories would tell you that it matters not if you do not have a good job, a good love life, or social life or a good career. Because when we talk of death, nothing else seems to make sense, nothing else seems to matter.

He'd always talk of things that would seldom make sense, if at all. And what he couldn't say, he would write.

He had to write. There was no other way. For the only one who'd listen to him had left him far behind. And she went not to a place where he could meet her, even if for a day. She went to an abode out of his reach.

"Heaven", he said, "she dwells there now."

I could cry, I could say I am sorry for asking about her or I could say nothing at all.

Silence, I choose not. For sometimes it's as cruel as the harshest of words.

As I search for words what to say to this grief-stricken soul, I wonder hadn't I always thought of stories he must have been hiding. Hadn't I always wondered what might be the reason behind the way of living he chose. And now that I got to know the immense pain he bears each passing day, I secretly wish I had never wondered, I had never asked.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

In the darkest of nights,
she appeared with a smile,
even in the faint moonlight,
she shone bright...

'the face of an angel'
he must have quoted,
seeing not the silver
her pale hand held...

and so before the sun rose
stabbed he was
and when the cold hard ground
embraced his corpse
'but you were my savior'
was all he spoke..

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

And then one fine day,
it ceased to matter,
altogether,
when there was nothing left but oblivion,
disguised as felicity,
dressed as sorrow,
broken at places,
yet hopeful for a new tomorrow,
and they could, but see only one side,
so all they did, was presume the other...
The battle of words,
and one had to lose
another limped his way
to the grave he dug for himself,
and all the others
that survived the war,
screamed and wailed,
and hoped they'd died.

Monday, October 28, 2013

"But how can someone so young be so sad and lonely?" I often wondered looking at those lips that seldom smiled.
"There has to be something that's killing her from within. And if only I could help may be I would." I said to myself.

"You can if you want to." Said she, as a teardrop trickled down her cheek, "but I know you wouldn't."

I wondered if she really spoke the truth when she added, "For grief has always been so dear to you that you would make me writhing in pain in the brothel of your imaginations than to be playing with a bunch of balloons in the yard where I should have been."
"And may be that's why, you'd rather talk to me about this, than to write a story about me where I could live happily."

http://sanhitabaruah9.blogspot.in/2013/10/ablaze-within.html

Friday, October 25, 2013

"I'm not even hungry," She said when I asked her how it felt like to stay hungry for the entire day for the well-being of a loved one...

And I know there was love that knew no bounds between the two when she confessed with a smile, "And even he hasn't taken a single drop of water since the morning."

#KarvaChauth
The "Crush"ed Cycle: 
do{
Day 1 Reports: Subject seems extremely attractive
Condition: Crush

Day 2 Reports : Subject seems to have a charming personality
Condition: Heavy Crush

Day 3 Reports : Subject seems to be a good person
Condition: Could-be-love Crush

Day 4 Reports : Subject speaks bad English
Condition: First Turn-off encountered

Day 5 Reports: Playboy signs detected
Condition: in question Crush

Day 6 Reports: Subject is seen with one/multiple woman/women
Condition: Heart-break

Day 7 Reports: New Subject Found
Condition: Examine for possible turn-offs
}while(turn-offs <= 1);

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Because there are a million thoughts that never sleep
and a million more that wake up as each second passes by...
And it's insanity inside
but I can no longer keep quiet
Oh, I can't speak as well
I need to write
I have to write...

Sunday, October 13, 2013

There's nothing more unattractive than a man who blames predestination for his own failures and a woman who blames men for her own vulnerability...

Blame thyself 
It's scary how someone can be so sad within
but smile in front of the entire world...

And then they will weep till they choke, 
and then wiping those tears away, 
they will laugh with you as if nothing happened..

How then will you ever trust that person enough to leave them alone??

Stay. Simply stay.

Sunday, October 6, 2013

It's strange how people give up on you within weeks of promising that they will always be there..
and it's just sad that promises are destined to break
and when you had finally believed in that one promise
someday you give up on yourself too...
and it's not about love, it was never..
it is, at times, about barren hopes and a bleak tomorrow...

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Of all the things you said I couldn't do

forgetting you has been the easiest...

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Dahling, let those tears fall
they are not forever to stay
with them, let the brutal winter go too
for summer will be there for you

and may be this savagery
you do not deserve to see
but even if this cruel world hurts
know that I will be there for you...
You are the serenity I look for each passing day
and when you look back at me so lovingly
I know you're the divinity too
and I can spend the rest of my life
just looking at you

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Ofttimes I find myself in love with his simplicity
and I futilely search for him in this busy city
not his smile, face nor presence
his soul is what I long for with this tenacity 
I'd like to lose myself again 
in that cold wintry night..
cozy in my own company
I'd like again to write...
giving in to feelings
with all my might
I'd bleed my heart out
in solitude, to write...

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

I will love you like the desert burns along the sun when they are together,
and when you will be gone,
just like every one else,
I will cry for you like the snow that melts at the first hint of summer...
and hoping that you'll be back
I will miss you like the clouds lose themselves when it rains...
Do you have a shoulder to cry on?
Someone who would listen to your deepest woes without judging you?
Or is it just you and the image in the mirror?

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Exactly when will you give up?

When things will seem out of your hands ?

When situations will seem out of your control?

Will you try to control them? Or will you let go?

Will you give up then? Or will you keep holding on?

Don't tell me that I gave up; I didn't.


Because I didn't let go; I just let it be.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Do you know that pain of leaving when you look back expecting to see a face waving goodbye at you but all you see is a dark abandoned corner?

There won't be any reason to return then.

All you can do is look ahead and not to stumble and fall on the pit ahead waiting for you.

Monday, September 9, 2013

My Brain: Sit and Sulk. Think about all the bad stuffs that ever happened to you.

Me: No way. I'm sleeping.

*Brain gives in*

"Phone rings*

Me: Yes?

He: Hi.

*And he reminds of every bad stuff that ever happened*

*Brain wakes up*

*I give in*

*Another sleepless night*

Sunday, September 1, 2013

The moment when you realize no one understands, no one ever did, no one ever will.
You were alone, you always will be.
But may be, just may be, someone will look upto you someday. And when they do, remember to hide those tearful eyes, to smile and to say - "look, life's so good." :-) 

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

I am an optimist and when I am too sure of something or someone, well, of course it turns out that I am wrong 

.. at other situations, I imagine the worst and needless to say, I am again wrong
Why do we use the term "broken" for heart when actually it's made of tissues that don't break? I think we should use the word "heart-torn" instead
What can you do for love?
Can you leave a person for love?
Can you leave a country for love?
I think I wouldn't even leave my couch for love :-P
Congratulations.
You've just been demoted from the "pity" sector to the "apathy" sector.
To check the validity of this offer you can ask if anyone cares.
To cancel your subscription, go get a life.
Thank you.

Monday, August 12, 2013

One can simply never take back the words he spoke.
And when you know you unintentionally did hurt someone, instead of letting it go or keeping a distance from that person, you can actually do something to mend the broken. That's the least we can do, when circumstances never are on our side; we can stick to our words and promises even if people change and fate ruins..

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Apologize!
That's the least you can do to try to make right something you have wronged.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Sleep!

May be you will wake up tomorrow and find that things never changed, the apocalypse never happened, and everything's fine, normal, at home.

Or may be you will wake up tomorrow and find that things have changed, for the better, the apocalypse is over and there's light, hope and a new home.

Sleep, you crazy soul, just sleep. 

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

May be I find more comfort in melancholy than in love or romance... may be I will never be able to finish what I started... yet I hope that this night be a long one.. things will be different from tomorrow
Nay, you don't throw away those misplaced beads.. you find them, pick them up and make a new necklace.. probably not as beautiful as you imagined..but wearable nevertheless.. 
I loved you then
I love you still
the heaven knows
I always will ...

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

"Nostalgia"

How often we use this word reminiscing about the past - our childhood, school days, college days.. 

We feel nostalgic, we dwell in the memories of the past, we talk about how great those days were and how we would do anything to just go back in time and live those days again..

Perhaps we fail to realize the fact that tomorrow we will say the same things about today, about the days we are living in now, about the emotions we are feeling now, about the time we are spending now..

I love this day. I love this weird feeling I feel today. I belong here.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

It will be foolish not to get your heart broken, even once.
For having a broken heart makes you realize the immense capability it possesses
to mend and heal itself and to love far more intensely,
with every affixed piece of it that was once broken and torn apart..
Someday soon
I will forget you too..
Like in the day we seldom remember the starlit sky no matter how much more amatory it is than the ruthless Sun..
For the Sun promises to shine everyday
while the stars sometimes are hidden by those treacherous clouds..
and they tell me to embrace loneliness,
for it is real, it promises to be with you everyday
while you will be far away forced by the treacherous truth called 'distance'

Sunday, July 14, 2013

I think it's incomparably sweet when someone writes something for you.. 
even if it doesn't rhyme or even if it isn't very amorous.. 
even two lines of hatred written for you acknowledges the fact that someone spent a little of his time thinking about you.

Friday, July 12, 2013

It was either the chaos of a crowd of thoughts or the silence of solitude... nothing in between.. 

Monday, July 8, 2013

All your life you gape at that one doll in the store. You know you want it, to hold it, to touch it, to play with it. But when you finally get that perfect doll you just can not let it out of its safe packaging for the mere fear that you might break it, for you have seen others do..

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Loving is effortless.. while Relationships, they require your time and patience... the two things we all lack..

Friday, May 10, 2013

The funny and the most beautiful thing about LOVE is..

you don't need any one else to fall in love with,, you can love yourself, the ambiance

 around you, the things which belong to you, and even those which don't..

Saturday, May 4, 2013

For once, let's not show the tears we hold,

and hurt not the ones we love and care for,


let our smiles be enough bold,


so that the joy is shared,


but woes never told :)

Monday, April 29, 2013

She could hide a million tears,
or the zillion dreams she sees, 
but not that familiar smile
or the hopes that lie within...

Saturday, April 27, 2013

May be it needed a mention.
.
may be she expected his message..


may be he waited for her gesture..

Nay, it wasn't late..


but they could no longer wait..


and eons hence, with them played fate..

Friday, April 26, 2013

safe on a cruise
but the ocean seems endless today..
harbour's not far
but the sailor seems worn out today..
depth never mattered
but the sinking seems too long today....

Thursday, April 25, 2013

And her heart was still there

where all the happiness dwelt,

magical evenings were spent,

wrangles were ephemeral,

friendships were eternal..

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Come, fall in love

when the sky's so bright


see me, hold me


when there's still light


may be darkness 


will take away this life


turn it into 


a dream of the night...

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

It's not about me anymore
maybe that's what I always feared
and the day has finally arrived
and all I can do is to shut my eyes
to the unveiling truth
that's exuding so lovingly
Love, they say, it is
if I'm hurt by your words
little do they know
it's fear, of losing you,
that's running the show.. :/

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Another magical week passed,
a week that came after ages,
like a drop of rain
in the desert of blues,
now it's winter again,
a cold and lonely one,
now that you're gone..
and I await another spring
which you bring so dearly,
it seems distant, but promising..
ephemeral but soaked in the rain of love ♥

Friday, April 5, 2013

I had you as my nightmare
and I'm glad it's over
it's funny and strange
how you still manage to scare me
it's a blessing that
I don't let the fear show
and maybe someday
I'll walk past you
as strong as I pretend to be
and live, for once, fear-free
and may be that day
you will have me
as your nightmare..

Loving someone can never be difficult, it's when you judge the other person that everything tumbles.. Loving someone is easy, so I fall, rise or fly in love over and over again.. what's difficult is being loved in return.. Unrequited love is amusing.. It's more fun when the person you love doesn't know you do.. what's difficult is when he does.. and that makes you what you'd never want to be - Vulnerable.

Thursday, March 28, 2013


It rains everyday, in my yard..
yes, the drizzle you love so much..
and if only you could come once
we would have danced in the rain

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

I find beauty in sadness, and peace... and a mystery waiting to be solved.. the more you unfold the mystery, the more you are mesmerized by the layers of mystery lying underneath.. and solitude becomes the perfect company for sadness..

but again, the feeling you get when you realize you're not alone gives you inexplicable happiness.. and there's satisfaction in happiness,, and another mystery which is unknotted yet difficult to penetrate

Monday, March 25, 2013

I love you today, as much as I did yesterday, or probably a bit more than that..

You never asked, nor had I the courage to say and probably I'll leave it at that...